Republic City - Relinquishing

Republic City Book 2 – Relinquishing

Zukari sighed and looked at the clock, It was time to close. He was alone all day, dueling with his dark thoughts; his memories of his past, and everything that went wrong in this place.

“All I wanted were a few friends… and I only made enemies.” The young fire bender sighed and propped his head on the counter and looked at his bandaged hand blankly.

“If I ever wanted to be a victim of Amon, now would be that moment. Maybe I should have blown up when that tar detonated…  Or frozen to death trying to save my polar bear dog…” He closed his eyes slowly and sighed. He tried so desperately not to cry. He bit his lip and clenched his right hand into a fist and began to shake violently.

“Why did it happen? I just wanted to have someone to hang out with… I tried to be nice… I thought I was doing a good job… but no… I guess I wasn’t…”

He wiped his eyes before the tears could fall and he took off his two sleeves. He tossed them on the register and looked at his hands again. The bandage on his right hand extended to just before his elbow. He remembered it, remembered how he’d gotten that.

“I was careless, too excited… I should have just shown her instead of trying other things…”

He shook his head and sighed. He moved slowly toward the front entrance of the shop and looked out the door; his reflection was there, staring back at him.

“Why did she have me if she didn’t want me?” He looked down a little. He was thinking about his mother. She’d left him at a Fire Nation school when he four, turning five. She’d never been too happy with him.

“I guess I was just supposed to be a scapegoat or some form of… something…” He closed his eyes again and began to systematically lock the front door.

“Then there were the soldiers…” He’d commented absentmindedly.

The soldiers, some of his grandmother’s fleet men, were angry with the young child. Somehow they managed to get a hold of him and they let their fury and rage be known, by using the young boy’s back as their release.

Zukari turned from the door and let the blinds and shades close. He released yet another sigh and took a deep breath. His back still stung from what they’d done. But maybe that wasn’t the only reason it stung so much.

He made his way around the antiques, the things that his grandmother had obtained throughout the years, and he remembered when and how she’d gotten some of them. He was there for some of them and others, he’d been told stories.

“I’ll polish them up tomorrow… No one came in and they don’t really need too much work on them…”

He sighed again and turned his body toward the back. He looked at the front entrance and made sure everything was secure, with just a once over, before he continued to the more house part of the place.

He sat on the steps that led to the second floor and sighed. “I just wanted some friends… Am I really that bad a person to the point that everyone hates me? I never would have thought it was possible…”

He was thinking about all of his experiences in the city, 95 percent of which could have gone better.

He lowered his head and sighed. His shoulders drooped and he was just still for a moment. He seemed to replay every incident in his head. He always had a knack for remembering the things people hated him for; the things that he’d messed up; and everything that WASN’T happy in his life.

He took a deep breath and sighed. “Damn it… Jai, why did you go and lose it like that? No, wait… I remember… you lost your parents and storms weren’t your thing…”

He’d wanted to show her, to impress her with a new skill that he’d learned, lightning bending, however when he did get the chance, he had already hurt her feelings quite a bit. “I was just being realistic…” He sighed again, “I shouldn’t have tried to show her that… again, I was being careless and stupid… too excited…”

He took Jai out one day, after she’d managed to get her own place. He’d offered to help her get it fixed and everything. When he got her to go out, they went to a beach. He was going to show off lightning to her before they’d just let off some steam and relax after that, and maybe even get something to eat and have a nice time on the city.

“But that backfired like hell.” He commented to himself. He remembered when he released the lighting, it was a large charge and it was shot into the air and directed at a lightning rod, which ate the energy with satisfaction. Somehow, that got the girl upset and she was ready to spar. He wouldn’t have minded the spar, if not for the crazed look in her eyes and the sudden intent to end his life. He just wanted her to relax and be herself again… she was different after she’d gotten that house up the street.

“I had to win, if I lost that one, then that would have been the loss of my life too… maybe I should have just let her end me...”

Jai went berserk, she’d hurled flurries of raining ice shards on his person at the beach that day. He needed to get to her, to calm her down, but he couldn’t think of any other way at the time, since she wouldn’t let him get away.

“I was careful though… grandma said that only short bursts of weaker energy wouldn’t do any real damage, just kinda block her chi…”

He learned enough lightning at the time to know how to disable a person, without lethal or permanent after effects, but since he couldn’t entirely get a clear shot, for sake of losing an eye or his brain, he took a chance and ran at her with it.

He succeeded, and knocked her out. She was unconscious for a time and he’d tended to her while she was out, fishing her from the water and drying her body off as much as he could. When she woke up, she was even angrier, but thankfully, she only tried to kill him one more time.

“Why? I was only trying to get you to relax and be my friend again… you were going away and I couldn’t stop you… I couldn’t stop it… I just couldn’t…”

Jai jumped up, to her feet, and she’d collected enough water on her hand to make three ice daggers on her hand. She’d charged at Zukari like a raging Bison bull and tried to bury the ice in his skull. On instinct, Zukari defended himself, batting away her fist and flipping her on her back. She landed on the sand with a thud and a puff of sand came from beneath her and she’d stared blankly at the sky for a moment. He tried to help her up, but she defied his assistance and flung words of immense hate toward him before she stormed off.

“She was… right wasn’t she? I don’t do anything but hurt everyone, right?”

She’d blared that she wouldn’t be able to beat him, he bested her several times, and in each spar they had. He had been training all his life, and was training under a veteran general. How could he not win? But that wasn’t what hurt. She’d denied his feelings; he said once that he liked her. He found her attractive and he was not afraid to admit it. A little nervous, maybe, but not afraid; She’d said that he was lying and she said that she never wanted to see him again, and so far, that was holding true.

“…But… she’s right… I do hurt everyone…” He sighed again, recalling more times that he’d screwed up.

“I hate myself… why couldn’t I have been a damn non bender? All fire does… all it does is destroy stuff.” He wasn’t exactly referring to anything in particular, just something he’d heard in a story. Then he’d thought about that girl again. The blonde dancer with whom he’d shared a very short relationship.

She looked at him like he killed her family, at one point. This was before he’d resolved to cut his hair and his ties with everyone he’d met. They were at a thing in the plaza and he’d been invited, but he didn’t expect her to be there, and he certainly didn’t expect her to be there to see the same person he was there to see.

That situation in itself was bad from the start. “I knew I shouldn’t have gone there…”

Bai Li, she’d invited him to see her perform, and Karima was there, probably invited by the other person Bai had invited, Bawja. Zukari was hated by the guy, simply because Karima’s emotion were rather unstable, which caused a problem for the three of them, Zukari, Bawja and herself.

Luckily, the fight between Bawja and Zukari didn’t happen until the end of the day, when everyone, except for Bai and Karima had left. Zukari was certain to let it go then, to just let the homeless insanity that was Bawja just end him on the spot. A broken neck, simple, quick and effective, but Karima, despite her pained expression, saved him, but at the same time, seemed to spite him. He’d darted away from that scene like a little kid. He hated that about himself. He was weak, and managed to mess stuff up like it was no one’s business.

Zukari grunted and stood up. He tapped his forehead with his hands and sighed. There was so much wrong with him still… even after he thought he was on the right track, to moving on. But he still had that darkness there that was holding his heart in a vice grip and only getting tighter.

“I messed up there too… I shouldn’t have made that stupid bet… it was an idiot’s move and what’s more, I should have just accepted the defeat…”

He was thinking about that mistake, the ‘spar’ with Amaya and her cousin, Malina. Both girls are water benders, and they see close, despite… their differences. Zukari had made a bet; he would date both girls for a week if he’d won. He did win, but not without having some intense repercussions.

“I should have just quit… why did I have to be so damn persistent…?”

There were pints in the spar that he should have just accepted defeat. He was swarmed and even trapped in ice prisons and battered like no one knew, but he still battled the two girls and claimed victory. However, he’d made a big mistake. Again.

“Lightning… I should have shocked her instead… maybe that would have helped my case…” he pondered the happening and the chain of events. “Like hell it would have…”

He managed to separate the two girls and he’d flipped Malina to the ground and pinned her, but Amaya was coming to the rescue. He shot Amaya with lightning, but apparently missed his mark. He was aiming for her shoulder and at the time, he’d thought that what he’d hit. And not too long after that, did two earth benders decide to show up.

“People hate me… they just do…”

He knew it was true. Malina seemed to hold a deep contempt for him, especially after that. What’s worse is that two people he didn't even know just started off on a bad note.

“…Should I be glad I got away?”

Zukari escaped the two earth benders assaults, simple because he was faster. He was really tired too, but he’d been on an adrenalin high so the fatigue didn’t bomb him until he got home. He was not going to fight two guys who just showed up, just because something looked bad. He wanted to explain the situation, but knowing earth benders, they wouldn’t hear anything he had to say. He wouldn't be able to plead his case, so it was just a loss, a very big loss that was furthered because he’d really wanted a few dates with Amaya.

“If I would have lost, all I had to do was eat food. Was my reward worth that fighting? Worth that trouble? I should have lost. I should have quit. I should have given up…”

He sighed again and proceeded to his room. Malina had threatened to fight him again. He was now considering her offer and he would just let her take him down. He would just let go and stop trying so much. He was destined to fail anyway. Or so he thought.